How much is MINDSET and how much is BULLSHIT?

HONEST insights from a psychologist and mindset coach:

I did not have my mindset on track when I took my first coaching client in a premium 1k/month package.

In fact, my mindset was SO not on board that when he was a few minutes late in our demo session, I secretly hoped he would not show.

My mindset evolved as I naturally witnessed the powerful results and insights he was experiencing, and I slowly relaxed into the new identity as I was living it. The satisfaction of each session and each new discovery.

I did not have my mindset on track when I spoke on Romanian television, and I was once again hoping they would have tech issues and cancel 😂 It took me over 10 minutes of actually speaking to get my shit together and remember who I am.

I did not journal for 3 hours, hyping up my worth, my knowledge, my experience, about how good and nerdy and amazing I am, to do an “identity upgrade” of the coach that charges premium and appears on big stages.

In both situations, I ended up in front of the right person and pitched myself: “I can talk on your TV show.” “Add me to your mindset coaches promotion list.”

Now the true question is: what elements in my mindset WERE on track so that I could actively create these opportunities for myself and speak up?

What is the core difference between the people that get what they want and the people that are even afraid to ask and show up for it?

Is it mindset? Identity work? Nervous system regulation? Emotions?

Here’s my take:

A mindset coach will tell you it’s all identity work. A business strategist will tell you it’s all about strategy.

But all I know is that, ever since I can remember, my mother told me I am capable and smart and that I can do everything I set my mind to.

She encouraged me to sing my own song on a children’s stage, which then got so popular people couldn’t believe I wrote it.

She encouraged me to cherish my intellectual side and excel academically.

And it mattered in a way that transcends motivation, identity upgrades, and MINDSET. It was a somatic experience.

Let me explain.

👉🏻 We weren’t thinking when we developed our primordial permissions to go get what we want in life (or not). Our analytical mind was not even developed yet. 🤔

It was most likely a somatic experience. A feeling, not a thought.

Not a belief to do NLP with. A body memory. A sensation. A synesthesia, even.

👉🏻 Between the ages of 0–8 — that’s the time when we were programmed the most.

We were in Alpha, Delta, and Theta brainwave cycles. You were in a state of hypnosis before it was even cool. Or deep yogi-like meditation, call it as you will.

👉🏻 So you may want to imagine yourself walking around in a permanent state of hypnosis, absorbing everything like a sponge — not only beliefs, but the entire environment of your family.

Between birth and 2 years old, our brain functions primarily in the lowest brainwave cycle, that is 0.5 to 4 cycles per second. Yep, the Delta waves.

👉🏻 After that, there’s the Theta state. Those wave frequencies measure 4 to 8 cycles per second and are predominant in children aged between 2 and 6. => Super-learning state. Maximum suggestibility.

If your mother tells you you are a caterpillar, you are going to believe it.

Also, if your mother makes you feel as if you can do anything and GIVES YOU PERMISSION to take your shot, you ARE going to believe it.

👉🏻 Between ages 6 to 8, the brain waves shift into an Alpha frequency, 8 to 13 cycles per second. The analytical mind begins to form.

NOW we are talking mindset work.

Can you tell me please how you are going to shift 8 years of your life with affirmations and a vision board?

👉🏻 You know, I laugh when I see some coaches — I bet you do too. It seems like they are walking through the desert with a watering can, not having the tools and understanding to deal with the whole package of a human being.

So no, it’s not just mindset. It’s primordial development. A somatic experience. A feeling, not a thought.

Is mindset still important?

Heck yes.

Mindset matters.

But you cannot affirm your way out of a body memory that learned asking is dangerous.